Recovering from #3

The last round of chemo was a little rough. It wasn't as bad as round #2 mainly because I had no fever or flu like symptoms this time around. That's a good thing (thanks Martha).

If anything it seems that this time around was a little 'easier' than the previous two rounds. Not that any of this is easy. But there was very little nausea, so little that I only took my anti-nausea medication four times (maybe five?).

The main thing this time around was fatigue. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday I slept more than I was awake. By Thursday, yesterday, I was ok but still tired. I managed to go to work for a few hours and came home and napped for a few more.

Today I can still feel the chemicals in me and I can still feel a little fatigue but for the most part it's manageable and I'm able to ignore it.

On the bright side I'm fairly certain the chemo is working. Things are thicker then they have been in a long time and they pass a lot easier as well. There's no blood anymore, which is a drastic change, as I was seeing blood just about every time I went to the bathroom. Also, for about a year and change I had a slight pain in my stomach near my cecum (which I eventually found out was another tumor (I have two in my colon)) which I haven't felt for about two weeks or more.

My next round of chemo is the Tuesday after Memorial Day. This will include a digital exam (ie. the doc will be sticking a finger up me) which the doctor will hopefully be able to determine if the tumor near my rectum has shrank.

I've realized so far through this that I don't like a lot of the terminology that the "cancer society" (people with cancer) have adopted. For example, I don't see this as a "battle against cancer" and I hate hate hate it when people die from cancer and it's referred to as "so-and-so lost their battle against cancer".

This almost seems to personify cancer, as though it's a sentient thing actively attacking you. In actuality it's just a malfunction of the body. A horrible and terrible malfunction, but one nonetheless. I'm not battling anything. I'm getting treated to fix something in my body that has gone wrong. It's not a battle, it's not a fight, it's an illness. And it's curable.