Saturday, April 18, 2009

Feeling Good

My first chemo wasn't too bad. If anything it was more psychologically draining than physically. Though, all I wanted to do Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday was sleep.

I had to wear a little fanny pack for three days (Mon - Wed) that was pumping 5FU into me for 46 hours straight. That was a little annoying and made me feel awkward and self-conscious. I essentially stayed inside for three days and did a lot of sleeping. The nausea wasn't too bad until Wednesday once the fanny pack was removed. I continued taking my Compazine (anti-nausea medicine) through Thursday but tried to use it sparingly since it makes me so tired.

By Friday I was feeling much better and today I'm feeling almost back to normal. I still have the tiniest bit of an unsettling feeling in my stomach but other than that I'm feeling fine. I was able to get out and run yesterday and today -- I miss running. Earlier today I was able to eat a meal until I felt full as opposed to the past few days where I was only able to eat until I felt sick.

Of course, chemo treatments supposedly get more difficult the further you get into it. I'm feeling good though and optimistic. I have 9 days until I have to go back (yes, I'm counting) and I'm going to try to enjoy those the most I can.

Love each day.

Friday, April 10, 2009

It's official

I start chemo on Monday.

I will be going in every other Monday for chemo (I'll be wearing a pump for three days, so I'll be going back on Wednesdays too, but only to have the pump removed) .

They want to do three cycles of chemo (six weeks) and then start me on chemo/radiation as long as I'm responding well. There was no mention how long the chemo/radiation would last, but I'm assuming another 3-6 cycles after. I think I'm still looking at surgery some time in June or July. Then some more chemo afterward and then hopefully all clear.

I'm nervous about Monday but I'm sure most of it is just the fear of the unknown. I'm also happy that treatment is about to get started and I'll soon be on my way to being cancer free. Even if I have to sacrifice my colon.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Proctocolectomy

I had my second appointment with my oncologist yesterday who scheduled me to start chemo on Monday.

But then today I had my second opinion with a surgeon at University of Maryland and he suggested removing my entire colon. He's worried that because of my age if the colon is not removed I have a very high chance of recurrence. So confident that he definitively said I would get cancer again.

This operation would not require me to have a bag, which is good. My small intestines would be hooked up directly to my rectum. The downside is that I'd have diarrhea like stools for the rest of my life and probably have to use the bathroom 5-8 times a day. He was adamant that the colon come out. The next step, from his opinion, is for me to have an endoscopic ultrasound (I'm learning so much!) which will determine the depth of my rectal tumor.

Basically, this test will determine my course of treatment. Chemo/radiation then surgery then more chemo/radiation? Or surgery then chemo/radiation? I meet with him again next Tuesday to discuss the results to the endoscopic ultrasound which I'm having tomorrow.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Acceptance

It's been a few weeks since I've written and a lot has happened.

I met my oncologist and soon went in for a PET scan which showed no signs that anything had spread. All my organs look good and show no sign of metastases, which is good news. Of course better news would be "you don' t have cancer" but I'll have to wait a few months to hear that.

On Thursday I went in to get my portacath installed. It hurt a lot Thursday, requiring me to take three oxycodone in total (oxycodon + ambien = oh my). Today, Sunday, it's feeling fine and I barely notice it. If I turn my head certain ways I can feel the stiches but I suspect in a few more days when it's completely healed I'll forget it's there.

Monday I have a second appointment with my oncologist, which is when I'm guessing my chemo will be scheduled.

I'll be relieved once the chemo starts. I wouldn't say I'm looking forward to it but just that I'm looking forward to getting this all behind me. Someone wrote me an email reminding me that this is just a "6 month bump in the road". Six months isn't so bad.